The one fixed is change.
I grew up listening to this tune by the Scorpions, and it nonetheless brings a pang of longing and disappointment, and is it hope? And I didn’t know the complete undercurrents of the tune on the time, however its wistful tone actually resonated with me.
And I’ve been dealing with a lot change not too long ago, it’s arduous to get my bearings. Particularly within the month or so for the reason that information of my promising scans…it appears I’m on the verge of seeing a life for myself once more, however in fact I’ve nonetheless been dwelling a life…however you already know what I imply. I’ve needed to dwell within the current for the previous six months, a lot in order that trying past the subsequent week or few weeks simply didn’t appear potential. However all this phrase salad is to say the one fixed is change and I’m grateful that I’ve had such a safe base of family members which have offered sufficient stability that I can climate the winds of change with a little bit of grace. It’s like I’m a blade of grass, blowing within the wind. Generally the wind is whipping me round, bending me nearly to the bottom and roughing me up, however you all preserve me grounded, set in place, in order that the wind can attempt to rip me up, however it could actually’t. My roots are too deep.
Woo, are you able to inform it’s 3am and I’m again in my early morning writing part? 😄
I’m positive you might be all keen to listen to in regards to the massive birthday celebration bash…it was fabulous! I believe nearly 50 individuals got here out to Amber’s place in Corvallis. Individuals introduced flowers and snacks, contemporary strawberries from close by farms, and a lot pleasure. It was such a stunning gathering….regardless that one thing acquired to me. It may need been a nasty sandwich, or the warmth, or some ache I’ve been having in my left shoulder, however I vomited a number of occasions on Saturday and it aggravated my throat sufficient that I misplaced my voice, and it left me with barely a whisper. Actually, it left me principally listening to everybody round me chatting about adventures previous, current, and future. And a lot serendipity occurred! Dr. Grant, a hiker I had met on the Cascade Ruck final yr got here, and simply occurred to be heading all the way down to hike the Bigfoot Path, and wouldn’t you already know it, Fireweed, who’s on the Bigfoot Path board and was planning on giving her a journey to the path was additionally up for the celebration and the 2 met for the primary time. Dr. Grant even acquired a journey down from the celebration on Sunday to begin climbing the path. And Anne, Amber’s spouse, related with my good pal Sage once I remembered they have been each from the identical very small northern Californian city…so small that in fact their paths had crossed a few years in the past when each lived there, but they have been assembly on the celebration, of all locations, years later.
The magic of individuals, good individuals, is a giant half of what’s protecting me going. Such form and beneficiant individuals. Sue, a volunteer that I’ve had on a few ONDA volunteer journeys, got here as she lived in Corvallis, and wrote to me later and mentioned “I knew nobody, besides you, once I confirmed up. But— I knew instantly that is “our neighborhood”. You, your life, your work, brings out the great in individuals —- identical to the mountains, the rivers, the oceans, as we traverse this earthly panorama.” That’s simply every thing. My coronary heart is full.

So sure, I used to be sick and it lingered the subsequent day, however we ate bagels and drank espresso within the shade of Amber and Anne’s large sequoia tree in her yard, enjoying “transfer with the shade” because the morning solar shifted within the scorching day.
Nemo and Pouch (my PCT 2006 besties) received the award for having traveled the farthest…from upstate NY! Only for the weekend!

There have been so many individuals I hadn’t seen in ages who got here out. I couldn’t have requested for a greater celebration. I hope to have many, many extra. Some advised or not it’s an annual factor! Who needs to host subsequent time?
And naturally, Amber’s Nomadic Pizza was an enormous hit. She and our pal Megan sweated for hours slinging pies for us within the scorching, scorching wood-fired meals cart, and it was so scrumptious. (Amber can cater non-public occasions like my celebration…please ebook her when you’ve got one thing developing!)

This week has been one filled with physician’s appointments and hanging with my little brother Dan. He simply purchased a brand new automotive and wished to stretch its legs and see me too. Dan is within the Air Pressure based mostly in San Antonio, so he drove three days up, arriving simply in time to exit to dinner with Kirk and me on my precise birthday (Monday, June 9….the most effective day of the yr!).
He took me to fulfill my new oncologist and to wrap up with my outdated one. He took me to get extra labs finished and together with one other MRI. We took walks alongside the river and drove as much as the mountains for a day, too. It was a chill however fantastic go to. Thanks Dan!

I’ve extra appointments earlier than I head out once more to go to my mother and father subsequent week. All three of my brothers might be down there too, so it will likely be one other busy week. My dad’s Alzheimer’s is progressing, and his time is proscribed, so I’m glad we’re all capable of collect collectively.
So regardless that my prospects of well being proceed to enhance, I’m nonetheless caught dwelling within the second, taking note of every day because it comes. The peonies that I acquired for my birthday are a superb reminder of that…every day they open just a little extra, altering ever so barely, however altering, in order that it’s price stopping and appreciating them in every slight part. Positive, I may suppose forward to when they’re lifeless and gone, however why try this when they’re vibrant and alive and in entrance of me now? Take pleasure in them. Take pleasure in this. Benefit from the second.



























